30 Days of Thankfulness Day 4

For as far back as I can remember, I wanted to work. I wanted to be a CEO or a manager of a hotel. I wanted to travel and I wanted to be unencumbered. (see this is how I saw husbands and children) This mentality continued through high school and on into college. Actually, though the best laid plans of mice and men go, it didn’t always go as I’d planned it. Things happened that prevented me from continuing college. Then I was needed at home to help take care of things. Then as I worked harder and harder, I made too much money to receive help to go to school, but not nearly enough to pay my own way. Such is life. I’m not complaining about it, it just is what it is. Years go by, and I find out that I have PCOS which is a very serious fertility disorder. It was explained to me that mine, in particular, didn’t allow me to ovulate. And I’ll be honest, I was mad about that. I was really angry because my choice was now taken away from me. But eventually, I decided that there were millions (well, ok, maybe not millions, but I’m sure there are a whole bunch!) of kids out there that would need someone to love them. So one day, when I was ready I’d be ever so happy to adopt one and love him/her with all my heart.  So as the story goes…

Girl meets boy….and he felt the same as the girl. He wasn’t particularly interested in having children but if he ever changed his mind, he’d be more than happy to adopt. (You see, boy also had a fertility issue.) Fast forward 2 years, we find out that we’re expecting our first child. In utter amazement, I sat there and watched the ultrasound images on the screen and watched this little person moonwalk in my belly.

Fast forward another 3 years, our son has had some issues. He has asthma and allergies and he has mild seizures. But he’s so precocious and sweet and smart. And his Dad works very hard and long hours so I can stay home with him. And for that I’m ever so grateful. So this girl, who never dreamed of having a family of her own, couldn’t imagine any other life than this one. I couldn’t imagine working during these early years. Now mind you, sometimes I wished I could get away. But on days that I get great big smiles and lots of hugs and kisses and crazy stories about Bunny eating his cheerios, those are the days that I am glad I get to sit at home with him and grow with him. (Those days are every day…for the most part.)

So on this 4th day, I’m ever so grateful that I’m given the chance to stay home with my little boy.

(Yes I know it seems like I’m a day behind. But I spend the day deciding on what I’m going to be grateful for, and THEN I write about it. Instead of writing about it before the day comes.)

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